Handling ‘Weighty’ Conversations
Be prepared to expertly navigate the topic of weight in social situations this holiday.
Tips and scripts for responding to comments about weight during the holidays.
The holiday season can bring joy, connection, and unfortunately, unsolicited comments about weight. Here are some tips for navigating these situations with confidence and kindness.
General Principles
Stay Calm: Take a deep breath and remind yourself that others’ comments often reflect their own beliefs, not your worth or progress.
Choose Your Response: Decide whether you want to engage in the conversation or redirect it.
Prepare Responses: Having phrases ready can help you feel more confident and in control.
Responding to Comments About Weight Loss
Express Gratitude and Redirect
“Thank you! I’m focusing on feeling my best these days. How have you been?”
Minimize the Focus
“I appreciate that. I’ve been working on some healthy habits, but I’d love to hear what’s new with you!”
Set Boundaries if Needed
“I prefer to focus on non-scale victories, but I appreciate your kindness.”
Responding to Comments About Weight Gain
Deflect Without Explaining
“I have my ups and downs and am focusing on my health.”
Shift the Conversation
“I’ve been working on some new goals. What’s your favorite part of the holidays?”
Set a Firm Boundary
“I’d rather not discuss my weight, but I’d love to talk about something else.”
Handling Especially Hurtful Comments
Address It Directly but Kindly
“I trust you mean well, but comments about my weight are something I don’t welcome. Thanks for understanding”.
Remove Yourself
If the situation becomes uncomfortable, excuse yourself to get some air, take a moment to regroup, and find a supportive friend or family member who can be with you as you ride out any challenging & lingering emotional disruption.
Reframing Your Mindset
You Define Your Worth: Weight comments don’t reflect your value or progress. The often reflect the weight biases of the person commenting
Use Compassion: People very often don’t realize the impact of their words. It maybe helpful to assume that the other person is doing their best and may not know better than to comment on such personal things.
Own your power: Keep your focus on your own journey, not other’s opinions.
The holidays are a time to celebrate and connect with friends and family. By preparing for potential comments, you can focus on enjoying social gatherings while staying true to your goals. Remember you are response-able: able to control how you respond.